family – B Is for Blessed!

Spring Forward

“Do not remember the former things, Nor consider the things of old. Behold, I will do a new thing, Now it shall spring forth; Shall you not know it? I will even make a road in the wilderness And rivers in the desert,” Isaiah 43:18-19 NKJV

Some things should move with us. Memories. Love. Lessons learned. Others are meant to be forgotten and buried such as regret, disappointment, and fear.

Spring as a verb means to move in a forward direction; it also suggests momentum and height. Some of us have lost our momentum. We may not be stretching ourselves to attain the heights God wants us to achieve.

It takes effort to let go of pain and hurt. Remaining somber and disgusted doesn’t allow painful memories and emotions to fade. It takes determination to forgive, forget, and reset.

Now is the time to renew our minds and embrace new opportunities. As fresh buds bloom and we transition to a new season, consider the new thing God may be asking of you.

Behold, I will do a new thing, Now it shall spring forth; Shall you not know it? I will even make a road in the wilderness And rivers in the desert. Isaiah 43:19 NKJV

Mother’s Day…

When I was a child, I thought Mother’s Day was the simplest of holidays. Get gifts for mom, eat good food, and enjoy.

Decades later, I realized that Mother’s Day is more complicated than that. For some, it is a day of celebration. For others like myself, it is a day of remembrance. And then there are those who face this holiday scarred by the loss of a child and faced with a range of emotions I can’t even imagine. The second Sunday in May can be a poignant reminder of both the good and the bad.

Still, many of us can readily recognize women who played a pivotal role in helping us grow through the years. I am very grateful to have women in my life—many lifelong friends of my mother—who continue to love me though she is gone. A host of godmothers, aunties, neighbors, play aunts, coworkers, and even customers have mothered me at times when I needed it most.

The best Mother’s Day gift I ever received was my second born son, delivered just two days prior. One of my favorite memories is a rare brunch with my mother when she came to visit nearly a decade ago. The worst was Mother’s Day 2017—two months after losing her.

Thankfully, I was blessed by friends and family who assured me that I was not alone. I felt alone, but I really wasn’t. God blessed me through loving people even as I was still angry with Him.

God understood my anger and He certainly understands the emotions this day may bring to you. Whatever your situation, I pray it is a good day—as good as it can possibly be.

In memory of Kay Frances Shinholster Finley, here are three pieces of advice my mother gave me:

Always treat everyone with dignity and respect.

Good manners and a good attitude can take you farther than skills and experience. If you are likeable enough, someone will teach you what you need to know.

Give from the heart. The reaction to your gift isn’t nearly as important as the intention and sincerity with which you give it.

Happy Mother’s Day!

Christmas Presence

For Ashley, a post from Christmas past…

“Do not cast me away from Your presence, And do not take Your Holy Spirit from me,” Psalm 51:11 NKJV

Many people who celebrate Christmas and even some who don’t find themselves rushing around with too much to do and too little time to do it this time of year. A few are stressing over hosting duties. Others have parties they must attend. Still, more are in a frenzied search to find the perfect gift. If retailers had their way, we would all be enticed to buy more presents!

However, I challenge you to breathe a little and focus instead on God’s presence.

God is ever waiting for us to come before Him, worship, talk with Him, and listen to what He would say.

If some of us would only slow down, we could enjoy the goodness of God instead of falling into the trap of running ragged to meet the expectations of others. If only we put that much effort into pleasing God.

If you want to truly embrace the reason for the season, come into God’s presence. Slow down. Sit down. Bow down. Allow God to enter in your spirit and your space.

Christ’s birth and death provides us not only salvation but also the privilege to connect with God without the need for a mediator, high priest or intercessor. Jesus Christ left and ascended so that the Holy Spirit could be available to us. Such a perfect gift our Savior gave us, yet we often fail to “enter in” and appreciate the comfort and peace only He can provide.

The pursuit of things and our attempts to please others can often leave us with little time for God if we aren’t careful.

So, if you are in a continual state of chaos this holiday season, I implore you to run toward His presence. God can calm, refresh and restore. Allow Him to dictate your Christmas season and prompt you to be a blessing instead of constantly stressing.

Choose to end this year seeking God with a renewed passion. Allow each gleaming light to remind you of His Light. The best gifts can’t be placed under a tree. Only God can provide peace, joy, and unconditional love.

May you be overcome by God’s presence this Christmas season.

“You will show me the path of life; In Your presence is fullness of joy; At Your right hand are pleasures forevermore,”
Psalm 16:11 NKJV

“Repent therefore and be converted, that your sins may be blotted out, so that times of refreshing may come from the presence of the Lord,”
Acts 3:19 NKJV

HAPPY FATHER’S DAY

“I will be a Father to you, And you shall be My sons and daughters, Says the LORD Almighty.” 2 Corinthians 6:18 NKJV

“Honor your father and mother,” which is the first commandment with promise: “that it may be well with you and you may live long on the earth.” And you, fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord.”
Ephesians 6:2-4 NKJV

HAPPY FATHER’S DAY to all those men who are strong when we are weak, offer shelter from life’s storms, and pull us up when we fall down.

In memory of fathers who served and sacrificed, held thankless jobs without complaint and simply did the best that they could…

Thank you.

Happy Mother’s Day!

“Her children rise up and call her blessed”

Celebrate your mother, grandmothers, aunts, cousins, godmothers, teachers, community leaders and all the women who have positively affected your life. If possible, give them flowers while they can smell them and kind words while they can hear them.

Here are ten lessons I learned from my mom…

Keep your eyes on your destination, not your current location

Good manners show respect for other people

The value of a good education

A great attitude can take you farther than a good education

Money can’t buy common sense

Don’t expect anything you aren’t willing to work for

How to cook with love

Generosity

Unconditional love

How to pray!

Be grateful for all the great women God has placed in your life.

“Honor your father and mother,” which is the first commandment with promise: “that it may be well with you and you may live long on the earth.” Ephesians 6:2-3 NKJV

Mother’s Day…

Two words that evoke love or dread.

Mother’s Day.

This weekend, mothers of all capacities will be celebrated. There are mothers to be and new moms engulfed in the glow of their newfound status.

There are also mothers mourning the unimaginable loss of children born and unborn.

This will be the second year without my mother. It will also be the first Mother’s Day I spend without the company of my children.

When my husband asked me what I wanted to do for Mother’s Day, my answer was, “lay low.” A day that once brought about fun memories with my kids now makes me keenly aware that Mother’s Day is painful for many.

Yet, I distinctly remember one thing my mother said to me over twenty years ago.

“I will always be your mother and I will always love you.”

And she did.

The love of a mother and its bonds are strong.

It withstands life’s pains and problems. It allows grace for failure. A mother’s love suffers much. It restores confidence with a word and offers support in silence.

A mother’s love evolves and bends, but it never completely breaks. Maybe that’s why there is no other like a mother.

Celebrate your mother by heeding her wisdom and mothering those in need when you can. You don’t have to literally be a mother to teach, guide and love like one.

And If you’re like me, who would do well to merely reappear when it’s over, I challenge you (and myself) to smile over memories and good times once shared.

Give thanks for the women that love and nurture you.

Mothers, step-mothers, grandmothers, godmothers, sisters, sister-friends and aunts.

Other mothers who listen to and encourage you.

Show them love while you can.

Be gentle.

Be kind.

Be considerate and wise.

Celebrate and give thanks for the great women in your life, past and present.

Even take a moment to celebrate you.

Happy Mother’s Day.

…and the Ivy

In the Christmas carol The Holly and The Ivy the characteristics of the holly reference our Savior Jesus Christ. The ivy is barely mentioned at all!

I’ve given this a bit of thought and wonder if there is a lesson here. For the most part, the carol refers to the holly. Only the smallest snippet is given to the ivy.

I’ve read all about the pagan rituals and the symbolism of holly and ivy and the contest between men and women. But I’ve got another take on this carol and its inclusion of the ivy. Maybe, this song lends itself to offer a deeper message.

What if we are the ivy?

Ivy requires support if it is to climb higher. It is often found clinging to walls or trees. It can’t reach any height on its own. Ivy has three “points” to its leaf. Father, Son and Holy Spirit?

Ivy is hardy. It’s tough to kill and its roots dig deep. We must be “hardy” to survive the perils of this life and still thrive. We have to have roots that can “dig in” to sustain us.

Ivy prefers growing in the shadow of larger trees that can protect it from the heat. I know I desire our Savior’s protection. God has saved me from many “hot” situations in the past. I certainly trust Him to save me through eternity.

The references to the holly in the song’s lyrics overshadow the ivy. Shouldn’t we allow our Lord and Savior to overshadow us? Rule over us? Should we not depend on Him (and not ourselves) if we are to ever reach the heights God intends for each and every one of us?

I may be reading far more into this carol than the author intended.

Or, God may be using my love of Christmas and all things green to once again reveal His truth to me. Jesus must be the most prevalent influence in my life. I must allow my will to be diminished and submitted to Him if I am ever to meet the heights He desires for me. I must cling to Him for support.

And live in His shadow.

One of my favorite carols is not about the ivy. It’s all about the holly!

Life is not about me. It’s all about Him.

Take this Christmas Season to enjoy your friends and family, eat great food, meet, greet and be merry.

Yet… it is all about Him!

Merry Christmas!

Wise Guys!

Now after Jesus was born in Bethlehem of Judea in the days of Herod the king, behold, wise men from the East came to Jerusalem, saying, “Where is He who has been born King of the Jews? For we have seen His star in the East and have come to worship Him.” Matthew 2:1-2 NKJV

A few years ago, I passed a Nativity scene near my home. The simple structures were at least forty years old. The faded plastic stood proudly without touchup or fanfare as a testament to tradition.

The Joseph, Mary and baby were placed prominently in a simple display. Yet, it was the Wise Men that caught my attention.

“And those who know Your name will put their trust in You; For You, Lord, have not forsaken those who seek You.” Psalms 9:10

The Wise Men actively sought The Messiah. The Bible is full of verses about seeking God. These men were wise enough to seek, recognize and worship giving the very best that they had. They did not despise their journey. Why do we despise our hard roads that bring us to God?

Is there a lesson in that?

My curiosity piqued, I read those first chapters of Matthew again. “Then, being divinely warned in a dream that they should not return to Herod, they departed for their own country another way.” Matthew 2:12

King Herod never indicated to these men he was threatened by the birth of Jesus. Herod lied and told them to return so he could also worship him. However, these Wise Men heeded the warning not to return the way they had come.

I can think of a few instances I would have benefited by heeding the warnings God gave me not to go a way that looked harmless. I didn’t recognize my “warnings.”

The Wise Men did.

I wonder if their zeal to seek God made it easier for the Wise Men to hear from God? Not only did they recognize their “warning,” they obeyed it.

I can’t say that I’ve always done the same. Still, I’m hoping to end this year wiser than I began.

Presents under the tree are nice, but the best gifts can’t be purchased…

“For wisdom [is] better than rubies; and all the things that may be desired are not to be compared to it.” Proverbs 8:11

“The fear of the LORD [is] the beginning of knowledge; [but] fools despise wisdom and instruction.” Proverbs 1:7

“Happy [is] the man [that] findeth wisdom, and the man [that] getteth understanding.” Proverbs 3:13

Joy to The World!

“And the angel said unto them, Fear not: for, behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people,” Luke 2:10 KJV

These words were spoken on the very first Christmas. The message the angel brought was a joyful one. This verse precludes, “For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Saviour, which is Christ the Lord,” Luke 2:11 KJV.

No matter what trials we may face or are forced to endure, our situation is temporary. Not eternal. Yet many of us become overwhelmed, frustrated and despondent by situations, people and circumstances. The very fact that we indeed have a Savior is reason enough to be joyful!

Though we must deal with those situations life brings upon us, it is important that we keep them in perspective. The odds are great that the very things that bring out the very worst in us now, will be inconsequential years later.

In this Christmas season, if each of us makes a concerted effort to be joyful, it would be a greater testimony than any scripture we could quote or sermon we preached. If we allow our conduct to become a testimony, especially as we walk through our fires, how many more people would be interested in learning about our Savior, the only One who can offer true joy?

“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith,”
Galatians 5:22. KJV

If we would allow ourselves to be overcome by the Spirit instead of overcome by the world, we could turn others toward the one true God. As Christians, our testimony should include behavior that others would strive to implement not circumvent!

We should draw men toward the Light, not repel them with pessimism, condemnation, or a critical spirit. Who wants any of that!?

A joyful heart invites people to want to learn more about our God Who provides peace and joy even when circumstances aren’t necessarily peaceful or joyful. The increasing stresses of this world do fight us at every turn. I readily concede it is not always easy to be joyful. Thankfully, we aren’t relegated to doing this in our own power.

“Now the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, that ye may abound in hope, through the power of the Holy Ghost,” Romans 15:13. KJV

Allow this Christmas Season to be a joyful one. Focus on the Source of all true peace and joy. As followers of Christ we have something to be joyful about! Let us allow our joy to overflow onto others, especially those who don’t know our God. May our love, joy, peace, gentleness and goodness draw men toward the Light.

Merry Christmas!

“But let all those who put their trust in You; Let them ever shout for joy, because You defend them; Let those also who love Your name Be joyful in You.” Psalms 5:11 NKJV

“that you may walk worthy of the Lord, fully pleasing Him, being fruitful in every good work and increasing in the knowledge of God; strengthened with all might, according to His glorious power, for all patience and longsuffering with joy,” Colossians 1:11 NKJV

“Those who sow in tears Shall reap in joy,” Psalms 126:5 NKJV

Merry Christmas?

Although Christmas is my favorite time of year, Christmas is not “merry” for many.

The holiday season can become a catalyst that accentuates grief, sparks depression and brings about a range of emotions, some of which we would rather not face. Not everyone has a legacy of Christmas memories that leave them feeling warm and cozy.

This Christmas will be one for many who are struggling with loss, and a great number of them may be relieved when the holidays are over.

And there is absolutely nothing wrong with that.

Some people may very well need to tend their wounds instead of catering to the expectations of other people.

Insisting those who are hurting be joyful is unrealistic. We can’t always understand someone’s pain, but we can certainly respect it.

By faith, I am trusting God that much joy and laughter awaits us this Christmas.

One reason we celebrate the birth of Christ is the promise of a new life that doesn’t suffer the ills and pains of this earthly world. Those who trust Him have a promise of something better for eternity.

Through faith, we win the mental battle that allows us to see the light that eventually breaks after every storm. Jesus is the Light of the world elevating us above despair and defeat. If you are feeling overcome, look to the Light!

Call on Him.

If you are hurting this Christmas season, my prayer is that you receive His peace on earth and goodwill from men!

Now may our Lord Jesus Christ Himself, and our God and Father, who has loved us and given us everlasting consolation and good hope by grace, comfort your hearts and establish you in every good word and work.
2 Thessalonians 2:16-17 NKJV