mental health – Page 3 – B Is for Blessed!

Lessons From A Spider…

I do have a few neurotic and irrational fears but spiders are not one of them. Thanks to E. B. White’s Charlotte’s Web I’ve only viewed spiders as helpful…as long as they don’t crawl on me.

There are lots of spider webs in my garden these days. Makes me wonder if they are moving toward their eventual demise as “fair season” is underway here in Georgia. One of the great things about Charlotte was that she simply used what she had to make a difference.

Charlotte was smart.

She was also eager.

She could have simply felt bad for Wilbur and watched him go off to slaughter. Instead, she used what she had, her smarts and “web design” to save him. She didn’t do so seeking accolades for herself, her goal was simply to help someone in need.

How many times do we do “good deeds” expecting nothing in return?

Sure, it’s great when someone appreciates our efforts, but if they don’t we should not allow their indifference to dampen our joy of giving.

Wilbur was grateful for Charlotte’s efforts but people in our lives won’t always have that same affection for us when we do things that help them.

As I photographed my own “Charlotte,” I thought of what a great testimony this spider is.

My spider has done all it can to help itself by spinning a huge web. Now it simply waits patiently for breakfast to come to it. It is not crawling around stalking other bugs in my yard. The spider waits confidently knowing that what it needs will eventually find it.

How many of us are this confident in our faith?

We often sweat and toil trying to make things happen. We often struggle to keep our faith all the while playing out various scenarios in our mind. Very few of us wait as patiently and assuredly as this spider as we wait for God to deliver what we need.

Instead of waiting, many of us construct our webs without Divine guidance. We may waste time, energy and end up frustrated as we attempt to concoct our successes instead of “being still” and allowing God to work on our behalf.

Often, we strive to “do something” when all God really wants in a situation is for us to “be still and know Him.”

It takes maturity to wait patiently. Young children lack this trait. Some of us “older kids” take a bit longer to learn it as well. Yet, at some point we must mature from mere infants into mighty believers in regards to our faith.

I am waiting on a few things in my life to bear fruit even as I’ve made my share of mistakes while I wait. Despite my shortcomings, God proves Himself faithful again and again. I just need to remember God’s faithfulness the next time a crisis comes knocking on my door.

Patience and Expectancy. If God can speak through a donkey, surely I can learn a thing or two from a spider…

There are four things which are little on the earth,
But they are exceedingly wise:
The ants are a people not strong,
Yet they prepare their food in the summer;
The rock badgers are a feeble folk,
Yet they make their homes in the crags;
The locusts have no king,
Yet they all advance in ranks;
The spider skillfully grasps with its hands,
And it is in kings’ palaces. Proverbs 30:24-28 NKJV

Imperfect!

The faded hydrangea is no longer the dewy sweet pink of weeks ago. It is drier, faded and splotchy. When faded and speckled they have a different kind of beauty all their own.

Our society would have us yearn for perpetual youth. However, like the faded hydrangea, I’m still hanging on!

How many times do we casually toss things aside or fail to appreciate things and people after the “newness” has worn off. Everyday routines and obligations can make us take for granted those dearest to us after their “shine” has long worn away.

How is it even blessings we ask God for and receive, we can so easily become bored with, dissatisfied or make last on our list of our priorities as we search for the next new “thrill?”

Relationships are never perfect as they are composed of imperfect people, but often our flawed (not destructive) relationships are more satisfying than having none at all.

Too many times we stare at the flaws instead of being in awe of the perfect people for us that God has gifted into our lives.

I dare you to look at those old and familiar things in your life with a fresh perspective.

Even though we may not be what we once were, we still have the potential for beauty in new and different ways.

The hydrangea pictured above reminds me that my flaws are part of who I am.

I don’t always have to war against them. I can learn to accept them, as God has accepted me.

God used many imperfect heroes in the Bible to execute His will. Most of the “major players” in the most familiar chapters had “major issues.” Jesus would go on to keep company with and use some the very “flawed” individuals of their day to preach the Kingdom of God.

The harlot.

Tax collectors.

Religious hypocrites.

As Jesus used them, God can still use us.

Flaws and all…

Not that I have already attained, or am already perfected; but I press on, that I may lay hold of that for which Christ Jesus has also laid hold of me. Brethren, I do not count myself to have apprehended; but one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead, I press toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus. Philippians 3:12-14 NKJV

Deadly!

Then they cried out to the Lord in their trouble,
And He saved them out of their distresses.
He brought them out of darkness and the shadow of death,
And broke their chains in pieces.
Oh, that men would give thanks to the Lord for His goodness,
And for His wonderful works to the children of men! Psalm 107:13-15 NKJV

Small, seemingly insignificant things can be deadly.

I was reminded of this a few days ago. My oldest son was rushed via ambulance to the hospital because of a wasp’s sting. We now know he shares the same allergy issues as my husband.

Ironically, my husband was stung many times throughout his life before that last sting nearly killed him some years ago.

Other “small things” are also deadly. Literally and figuratively.

Like that wasp, some things are no less deadly even when we fail to acknowledge their killing potential.

Some of our habits may seem harmless, but when they keep us from becoming our best, we are the ones who are ultimately stung.

It is often little things that keep us from our greatest potential.

Procrastination. Inconsistency. Negativity.

A poor attitude. Lack of gratitude.

Some would argue that small things don’t make that big a difference. Besides, God forgives us of our sins.

And, yes, He does.

However, forgiveness of sins is not the same as God’s blessings and favor finding you when you choose to make better choices!

Are you always with people involved in criminal questionable behaviors? Guilt by association may close the very doors you are working to open.

Or, are you justifying white lies to ease your mind? If you want to be blessed with greater responsibility it will require greater accountability.

Don’t allow little things or habits to become deadly. You will find a multitude of people and things eager to pull you away from what God has purposed you to do.

Instead, stay the course! Eliminate those things and habits that would kill what God is wanting to birth in you!

Small changes can produce radical results.

A few minutes of prayer. A few moments alone.

Faithfulness.

A proper perspective.

Even the tiniest of steps will help you reach your goals if you take enough of them.

Don’t allow small things to kill off the best in you!

You will show me the path of life;
In Your presence is fullness of joy;
At Your right hand are pleasures forevermore. Psalm 16:11 NKJV

Be Renewed!

I recently heard a sermon regarding the importance of “quiet time.” In our electronic age of email, texts, and other “alerts” it can become harder to experience peace and quiet. As we are increasingly connected to one another we may risk becoming “disconnected” from our Creator.

Time without digital distractions or other deterrents is vital if we are to be continually renewed.

Daily renewal requires a daily Word.

What we need today isn’t necessarily sufficient for tomorrow. As fresh manna fed the body, a timely word feeds the spirit.

When the Israelites tried to save manna from one day to the next, it spoiled and become inedible. Just like them, we need to trust God to “feed” us daily as well. Gaining God’s renewal requires that we make ourselves available to receive it.

Very rarely can I hear from God with a lot of noise going on. I admit I am easily distracted. I have to mentally hang up a “Do not disturb” so I can receive the renewal I desperately need.

It is only in silence that I hear God’s still small voice. When I prioritize time for a new Word or to simply “be still,” I am far less prone to make poor choices.

Renewal is essential for a “blessed life.”

But those who wait on the Lord Shall renew their strength; They shall mount up with wings like eagles, They shall run and not be weary, They shall walk and not faint. Isaiah 40:31 NKJV

Who redeems your life from destruction,
Who crowns you with lovingkindness and tender mercies,
Who satisfies your mouth with good things,
So that your youth is renewed like the eagle’s Psalm 103:4-5 NKJV

And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God Romans 12:2 NKJV

But when the kindness and the love of God our Savior toward man appeared, not by works of righteousness which we have done, but according to His mercy He saved us, through the washing of regeneration and renewing of the Holy Spirit, whom He poured out on us abundantly through Jesus Christ our Savior, Titus 3:4-6 NKJV

Proactively reduce the “noise” in your life. Allocate time for God and minimize strife.

We are all weary at times but we don’t have to stay that way. Moments of peace, a new Word and a fresh perspective will renew and equip us for whatever God is calling us to do.

Don’t long for yesterday’s blessings. Rejoice in today’s possibilities.

“Create in me a clean heart, O God,
And renew a steadfast spirit within me.” Psalm 51:10 NKJV

Home!

A few days ago I enjoyed the opportunity to go home.

Not to the house in Georgia where I live with my husband and two boys but back home to my mother’s house where I grew up and lived for nearly twenty years.

Everyone should have a “safe” place to turn.

Not necessarily a physical structure, or even a destination but a corner of the world where one can retreat and just…be.

We are often called upon to be many thing in our lifetimes. A spouse. A parent. A child.

Employer. Employee.

Supervisor, facilitator, worker bee.

We are often labeled by others and even label ourselves to such a degree it is quite easily to forget who we were created to be.

I can’t always run home to mom when the urge hits me like a hammer, but my Father is always near.

Unlike people, God understands every hurt and pain. He is ever-present waiting for us to ask Him, like a small child, for direction. Why this and not that? God protects. God is patient. I don’t even have to drive for hours to find His understanding.

There is a quote “you can’t go home again.”

I beg to differ.

Yet, home will inevitably change.

What once loomed large is now quite small. What was once so small now towers over you.

Roles change.

Perspective changes.

The things you took for granted can become oh, so precious.

My daddy planted Magnolias in the yard when I was about two years old. They were very small plants when he placed them in the ground. I doubt he ever imagined how tall they would become. They are several stories tall.

He passed away years ago but when I look upon the trees, I can smile.

Likewise, I planted ivy the year I married and moved out of my parents’ house and it is now everywhere!

I know my mother shakes her head each morning as she walks by it to get the paper. I’ve left a bit of myself (maybe too much!) there in the shadows of trees my father planted.

Just like my physical father, God “planted” things for me and even in me to grow.

Faith. Love. Hope.

I can smile at the growth from the many “trees” God planted for me now. I didn’t always appreciate the “trials” necessary for them to mature but in hindsight I am so glad He did!

Home is any place where I can just be me.

The “me” God created me to be!

Not a person scrambling to meet the expectations of others. Or, a person failing to meet my own goals and aspirations in what I perceive to be timely manner.

Home is where I can sit and smile and hear God talk to me. Leisurely. Familiarly.

I am grateful I don’t have to travel to God. He is always near.

What about you? Are you home yet?

The curse of the Lord is on the house of the wicked,
But He blesses the home of the just. Proverbs 3:33 NKJV

Dead Wood, New Life!

It dawned on me just recently why I love spring so much. I certainly enjoy the beauty of flowers and fresh green leaves. Warmer temperatures are also a plus. Yet, since I’ve learned to make gardening less of a chore and more of a joy, it is the promise for new life that makes me appreciate spring the most.

One of my favorite southern staples is the hydrangea. I love it because in most varieties, new life for each spring comes from its dead wood. I’ve found the same is true with some of my roses. The dead wood is the skeletal remains left when the first freeze zaps those green leaves right off. Without the leaves, my plants look less suited for the garden and more apt for a haunted house.

I learned the hard way that when the dead wood was cut, there would be no blooms that spring. Green leaves eventually emerged, but no flowers.

Not even one.

Those awful looking dead stalks laid bare by the cold of winter are necessary for later blooms!

If God does that much for my garden, how much more is He doing for me?

Our dead wood can produce new life as well. Those times when we feel like we’ve been stripped bare actually teach us what we need to manage our new beginnings. I believe it is far easier for us to appreciate some facets of life after we’ve experienced loss. Our “dead” situations can impart wisdom, compassion and knowledge that we can later access when God ressurects our dry bones!

I’ve experienced a few “resurrections” for which I am very grateful. There were times I felt dead, dry and brittle. I probably looked the part as well. It felt like my “winter” would last forever. But I clung to hope and continued to pray. I’ve since learned the absence of a “yes” isn’t’ necessarily a “no.”

Sometimes God’s silence simply means, “Not now.”

I think some of us become so disheartened with our defeats/death that we lose hope for future blooms and fruit yet to come. So much in the garden has to “die” before it can ever produce again. There are things in each of us that must die if we are ever to grasp hold of the blessings our Father would give us.

If you have a “dead” situation or simply feel like all the life has been sapped out of you, fear not! Our God specializes in resurrecting the dead. With God, there is always hope for a new and victorious life.

Even here on earth.

Most assuredly, I say to you, unless a grain of wheat falls into the ground and dies, it remains alone; but if it dies, it produces much grain. John 12:24 NKJV.

Jesus said to her, “I am the resurrection and the life. He who believes in Me, though he may die, he shall live. And whoever lives and believes in Me shall never die. Do you believe this?” John 11:25-26 NKJV

Give It Up!

Give up self-sufficiency

Give in to Christ and be set free

God knows our faults, yet loves us still

Our hurts and pains are His to heal

Give up your sorrows, give up your fears

Look back no more on your lost years

Give up dwelling on past mistakes

Enjoy life! Give yourself a break!

Look up to God, enjoy His wealth

Give up the focus on yourself.

Christ paid the price that we may live

Eternal life is God’s to give

Our spirits ache and yearn for God

Accept His gift, it’s not that hard

Don’t die a death brought on by stress

You’ve tried all else; Trust God, Be Blessed!

Therefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you in due time, casting all your care upon Him, for He cares for you.
1 Peter 5:6-7 NKJV

Survive or Thrive?

Winter is very much underway. Still, I am ever hopeful and looking forward to spring.

The transition to my “personal spring” will require me to cut off a few “dead things,” and work a bit harder. The promise of renewal encourages me to look forward to good things in my future.

Do I know what my good things are?

I haven’t a clue.

I do anticipate the best from a God Who is faithful.

Many of us merely survive. Periods of icy dormancy leave us barely making when it appears nothing productive is happening. To simply exist during those times when our winters wear us down is quite a blessing!

Yet, one thing I’ve noticed is that even after their season changes, some people fail to change with their season.

We can become so accustomed to struggling we fail to let go of our harsh past which is necessary to open ourselves up to a sun filled (Son filled?) future.

If we become stuck in a winter mentality, we can’t move forward into opportunities to thrive. New experiences that challenge us to bloom, grow or expand are dismissed because we fail to step out of our doldrums. Some people habitually live in a mindset of winter dormancy long after that season has come and gone.

I’ve been there.

I readily admit it took effort and repetition on my part to finally move out of the dark and into the Light!

Today I was reminded of a goal I tossed aside years ago. The harsh reality of one particular “winter” buried not only my aspiration but my inspiration as well.

I felt like I was running on empty. Looking back on it I was carried more than I ran. Regardless, today God led me to give that opportunity a second look. The season for this particular goal may have come once more.

Very few of us will bloom all the time. That just isn’t the way life happens. We must stay mindful and Spirit led to act when it is time to get moving. Doubt, fear and insecurities will keep us “stuck” if we allow it.

Our “winters” are as unique as we are but winter eventually yields to spring.

It may be the frustration of finding a job. Strained relationships. Family responsibilities. The death of a loved one. Financial burdens. Yet, when the “odds” are stacked against us, whatever the situation, we must dare to make a move. God’s blessings aren’t based on odds or luck!

Our first step of faith can move us into a new season! The decision to thrive instead of survive mandates we enjoy the journey instead of fighting to reach a destination.

We may not like those first vital steps. There may will be some discomfort. We may be forced to interact with people unlike ourselves. It can be frightening.

It may very well be exactly what we need.

What about you?

“To everything there is a season, A time for every purpose under heaven:” Ecclesiastes 3:1 NKJV

What Are You Searching For?

Seek good and not evil, That you may live; So the Lord God of hosts will be with you, As you have spoken. Hate evil, love good; Establish justice in the gate. It may be that the Lord God of hosts Will be gracious to the remnant of Joseph. Amos 5:14 NKJV

“Seek good, not evil.” We are implored to seek good. Seek God?

I had a trying experience yesterday. I could have allowed one customer to destroy my entire day.

See, I’m still honing the ability to hit my OFF button. I somehow allow evil thoughts to find my mental space. Anger festered inside of me. I continued to think about this customer long after she was gone. Long after I’d gone home. She even haunted my dreams!

All this did was make me tense, angrier and opened the door for more negativity to venture in.

However, I was also approached by two of my “good” customers yesterday. Both of them had very kind words for me. They appreciate what we do for them.

Their words were not loud like the hurricane customer who stormed out only to return and shout some more before finally leaving. Their words of appreciation were soft-spoken, understated yet sincere.

Sometimes we must seek good.

I could have allowed the “evil” to blind me to the good. And I would have not that long ago.

“That you may live.”

We must actively seek and magnify the God/good to stay sane and stable amidst all the “crazy” running amuck.

Preoccupation with “evil” make us stressed, tense, and angry. I recognize how dwelling on “evil” things affects my health.

Anxious mind. Queasy stomach. Fear.

These ailments are often manifestations of allowing the negative or evil in life to supersede the good and Godly right in front of us.

Not exactly living as God intended.

Seeking the good in all situations, allows us to truly live and not just exist.

I believe God sent me encouragement because “crazy” was on the way! Thankfully, I recognized the “God/good” in my workday!

Whatever we strive to “seek” we will find.

When we look for the best in even the worst of situations, I believe God meets our level of faith and expectation. If we constantly complain about our trials, even with due cause, what display of faith is that?

I don’t pretend seeking good is always easy. It takes diligence. It can be difficult. But in the end, definitely worth the effort.

“So the Lord God of hosts will be with you,”

The spiritual maturity necessary to seek the good enables us to direct our thoughts instead of our thoughts dictating our behavior.

If we can do just this one thing, the other areas in our lives will be that much better.

“It may be that the Lord God of hosts Will be gracious…”

“So, I say to you, ask, and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and it will be opened to you.” Luke 11:9 NKJV

Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things [are] noble, whatever things [are] lovely, whatever things [are] of good report, if [there is] any virtue and if [there is] anything praiseworthy—meditate on these things. Philippians 4:8 NKJV

New Year, New You?

With only a few days into the New Year many “resolutions” have been made.

And broken.

The stamina required for significant change looms far too large for many.

Athletes conquer their challenges with the help of a coach. Students achieve academic goals with help from parents and teachers.

But what about the rest of us?

We don’t have a coach or trainer to motivate us.

Or do we?

All the help and encouragement we need is readily accessible to us. We just have to ask for it.

And submit.

Our God is ever willing to help us become the best we can possibly be.

We often think we have to go it alone. But we don’t.

God is ever willing to provide the help we need.

When we ask Him.

Have you asked Him?

In our weakness God provides what we need to get us through. Those things that once tempted us can no longer hold us hostage.

What changes do you need to make?

Is your health in jeopardy? Need help with your finances? Relationships?

Progress isn’t always possible on our own. True and lasting “success” always comes through God.

The goals we strive for or our “resolutions” are probably changes the Holy Spirit has nudged us toward all along. With a fresh New Year we often dare to believe we can accomplish things that at other times seem daunting. If the New Year sparks positive change, go for it!

Eat too much? Drink too much? Too negative? Undisciplined?

The changes we are prompted to make prepare us for our purpose.

We will all change to some degree in this New Year. Whether the changes are for better or worse remains to be seen.

I challenge you not to obsess over resolutions or prior failures. Instead, take time and ask God what changes He wants you to make now.

I find my greatest regrets are not things I’ve done, but instead those things I didn’t have faith enough to try.

Do you really want the best life God has for you?

Enough to sacrifice? Dismiss your detractors? Go it alone without family or friends?

It’s all up to you. And Him.

How desperate are you for it?

“Watch and pray, lest you enter into temptation. The spirit indeed [is] willing, but the flesh [is] weak.” Matthew 26:41 NKJV

“Therefore submit to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you.”
James 4:7 NKJV

“I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith,” 2 Timothy 4:7 NKJV

“If you are willing and obedient, You shall eat the good of the land;”
Isaiah 1:19 NKJV

And He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.
2 Corinthians 13:4 NKJV